Media

Where the hell did this come from?

Doing some major cleaning during the holiday break, and I stumbled upon a dvd from an older pc that I previously owned – a pc probably ravaged by thousands, and thousands of mpeg-1 videos of pixelated pr0n.

The video, dated February 11, 2006 in the file information, is a Japanese special that covers a BLIND – yes – BLIND Mortal Kombat tournament player that apparently doesn’t need 20/10000000 vision to whip that ass. Those of you in the MK competitive scene probably have heard of him in recent years at EVO (unless there’s two blind MK players…) and I think he goes by the name of Rattlehead or something.

Anyway, check out this video where they fly this young fella out to play in Japan against “top Mortal Kombat Japanese players”. Keep in mind, this was 2006 and I don’t think Japanese people even know that “Americanu Pie-su of shi-tu Mortal Kombat” still existed.

Check it out – some highlights include who I think is Tokido as well as a CGI mammoth at the beginning representing Nebraska. Go fighting MAMMOTHS!

John is a Certified Movie Critic

Listen in as we take an in-depth look at John’s latest review of the parody music video, “The Pho”. His riveting commentary and understanding of the subtle nuances truly shows that his review skills are up there with Siskel and Ebert.

John: lol
John: https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?v=756227774406682
me: hahaha
John: what did the pho say
John: its actually good
John: looks like a korean vid
John: nice colors and modern and shiet

Amazing.

“nice colors and modern and shiet.” Someone needs to put that on a t-shirt. Kineda where are you?

Introducing… THE BOX

There was a problem.

The Choi Family house had a big problem. You see, John’s mom needed someone to move their old bootleg ass 42″ plasma tv (funny note… it was the TV I sold him) out of the house so we could install their newly upgraded SAMSUNG (of course – Korea FIGHTING!) LCD.

John calls me up, we hop in the “Prudence” the Prius (another story for another time) and head to south San Jose to handle biz.

Moving the TV goes without a hitch, except for the usual yelling that John and I do at each other. But once we were leaving the house through the garage, I asked him about this box of old VHS tapes he had lying around.

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“Oh, it’s just a bunch of old SF tapes and stuff. I don’t think anyone gives a shit about that stuff anymore,” said the Korean Inferno.

“What?!?!? Are you kidding me? This stuff is gold? Can I take it with me to archive? MILLIONS OF PEOPLE WILL WATCH IT!” I said.

And without his permission, I just stole the box. Granted, I probably hyped it up a bit, but there’s a lot of cool stuff that I don’t think has hit the web yet, and I figured I could make a small project out of it and share it with all you guys. Sound boring? Well, go fuck yourself.

Looking in the contents of the box, there’s a lot of goodies – like player cards from Texas Showdown 5 (I was there!), some old GamePro magazines, lots of old school Street Fighter match videos – Japanese and American alike, and I think a couple of softcore Korean pr0ns. You KNOW I will be viewing those.

To kick things off, I’ve uploaded a few matches from this japanese CD-R Disc that contains a shit ton of Japanese arcade CVS2 matches from 2005. It’s awesome to see high level Street Fighter players get their hands on a game that hasn’t fully developed at the time. Case in point – some motherfucker was ACTUALLY using P-groove. (If you don’t play CVS2, here’s a protip: NOBODY uses fucking P-groove, except for that dude Steve H or whatever his name was…)

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On to the matches:





Notice something? Yeah, there’s a special video in the middle – just seeing if you guys are paying attention. I looked up “CVS2” in Pornhub and that was the first video that came up. Apparently Latina chix love that A-groove hurr hurr hurrrr. BTW, there’s more where that came from. (EDIT: I took it out because 1. I’m a pussy, and 2. I was dumb enough to load the page while at work, and now my IT administrator knows I watch porn at work. 🙁 )

True or False: John Choi can Slam a Huge Beer Bong

The answer is true, and don’t you DARE challenge his drinking abilities again. (JK, he sux.) Even though he’s been caught red-handed pouring shots out on the pavement to avoid drinking and getting redizzied, we have footage from EVO 2007 where I brought the infamous “Tenderizer”.

Lifted from IRC:

[15:48] <@Abby_> Where’s the tenderizer?
[15:49] <@shytzoo-> DJ doo doo hands is up in here
[15:49] <@Roommate> dude
[15:49] <@Roommate> i don’t even know
[15:49] <@Roommate> there were 3 editions
[15:49] <@Roommate> of the tenderizer
[15:49] <@ROM> the tenderizer
[15:49] <@Roommate> original, champion edition, and turbo
[15:49] <@ROM> is that the thing that nearly killed bas
[15:50] <@ROM> I die now?
[15:50] <@albert_c> isn’t there a youtube video?
[15:50] <@albert_c> i wanna see that shit
[15:50] <@Roommate> http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lgxXlj4gwMQ
[15:50] <@albert_c> someone link it
[15:50] <@Roommate> lol
[15:50] <@Roommate> dude
[15:50] <@Roommate> that shit was like over 6 years ago
[15:50] <@Roommate> fuuuck
[15:50] <@Roommate> the best part of that video
[15:50] <@Roommate> is like it feels like a homosexual nerdy version of girls gone wild
[15:50] <@Roommate> without any chicks
[15:51] <@Roommate> just a bunch of dudes with video cameras
[15:51] <@Roommate> watching another dude suck down beer
[15:51] <@Ramin> while being on their knees
[15:51] <@Ramin> that is evo in a nutshell
[15:52] <@Roommate> hahahahahah
[15:52] <@Roommate> for real
[15:52] <@kerni_the> nerds gone wild
[15:52] <@ChoiBoy> damn
[15:52] <@ChoiBoy> memories
[15:52] <@Roommate> mamories
[15:52] <@albert_c> sick video
[15:53] <@ChoiBoy> tenderized

Living With John Choi: Champion Edition

champion edition

Hello readers! (All zero of you)

After a long hiatus, I’ve decided to start posting to this atrocity of a blog again. Why now? Well, there are a couple of reasons, which I’ll list below.

1. While I no longer actually *live* with John Choi (I know, BOO EFFING HOO), I still hang out with him regularly. He’s even got a new lady friend and we sometimes go on double dates. How effing romantical. (Since she’s nice, I’ll leave her out of the LWJC blog… for now.) And realistically, I have some sadistic pleasure in writing/exposing him and his goofy-mega-fobby ways.

In reality though, we still hang out a lot and there’s always interesting stories to log… like the one time I had to borrow his car to drive to his place and drop a deuce since I was about to seriously shit my pants. It did not end well.

2. I want to start getting back in the habit of blogging (is that what people still call it these days?) more regularly. Keep my skills sharp, like… uh… a really sharp pair of scissors… or something. (See, I need the practice.) Yeah, it’s selfish, but eat me.

3. *NERD ALERT LEVEL 5* – I started getting into arcade collecting. Mostly Street Fighter-related stuff and its variants — not really into the Mappy Land/Pac Man type of stuff, although mad props to those that are collecting that stuff. I tinkered with a ton of bullshit and have learned a lot, and instead of starting yet ANOTHER blog, I figured I’d just put it all here since it’s all SORT of related.

So, there you have it. We’ll see how long this lasts. I’ll try my best (serious) to keep this thing consistent with fresh content to keep your interest piqued. Don’t care? Well, it will be a nice way for me to log my John-Choi-Street-Fighter-Arcade-related adventures going forward. Stay tuned for more!

P.S. – Future foreshadowing: I stumbled upon this box that I forced Mr. Choiboy to give to me when we were both last at his mom’s place. While many of you might not care, there’s a ton of gold (at least to me) in this box. Here’s a sneak preview that I uploaded – a CVS2 match between D44 BAS vs Nemo which I don’t think has ever been uploaded aka THIS SHIT AIN’T EVEN OUT YET. I’ll post more details and more later.

Stay tuned. And if any of you see John Choi, let him know that I’ll be over to fix his wi-fi card sometime this week.

Buktooth and John Choi Make Love

Buktooth the nomad was in town this past weekend to visit family and play some bideo games with John. Immediately after, they made sweet sweet with each other, but unfortunately I ran out of tape and figured you guys would rather watch this.

There’s quite a few videos that I’m updating right now, so keep your eyes posted on this page as I’ll be uploading more videos as the day goes on.

EDIT: Hahaha, I just noticed that the still image for this first video is someone getting blasted with an ultra fireball. LOLZ

I seriously have these conversations with John

Choi (1:50:29 PM): http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C5e6eG6bXAQ
roommate (1:51:02 PM): god you NERD
roommate (1:51:04 PM): hahahahhahahaha
Choi (1:52:47 PM): rob sent that to me
roommate (1:52:58 PM): don’t try to defend your inner sc nerdiness
Choi (1:54:17 PM): PYLONS!

5 minutes later:

roommate (1:57:05 PM): hey
roommate (1:57:10 PM): what are you doing after work?
Choi (1:57:12 PM): PYLONS!
roommate (1:57:20 PM): sigh…

John Has Weird Taste

Choi (11:27:41 AM): http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dBDvXuf4WdQ
Choi (11:28:55 AM): amazing
roommate (11:29:13 AM): i don’t know if that’s amazing but okay
roommate (11:29:14 AM): hahaha

John Plays Street Fighter?

Oh yeah, I almost forgot that’s what this site was about.

Anyway, Ryan “Filipino Champ” Ramirez and Kineda came over for some gh3ymz and some bullshitting. Here’s a couple of their matches against John’s Sagat.

John’s Got Eyes Like A Hawk

Ladies, he’s probably staring at your tits with them.

Case in point, his latest Facebook Wall Post:

SRSLY? This is the second time he’s done some shit like that. (refer to “John’s Got Ears Like A Bat”)

Anyway, here’s the vid so you can see for yourself.